blahg

I hate the phone. I hate stopping what I'm doing and devoting attention to a person who, in all likelihood, I don't want to talk to. I hate not being able to choose the time and place of an incoming call. If you've ever called me, you know I don't answer. It came to my attention today how rage-inducing it is when I call someone and they don't answer. The only reason I called you was to talk to you and that's the one thing I can't do. The cognitive dissonance has gotten the best of me and I've decided to change my ways.* I will try to have my phone on me more often and answer it when it rings. A few key rules apply:

1. No message, no call back. If you don't take the energy and time to leave me a message, the thing you wanted to talk about is obviously not important enough to warrant a call-back from me. And calling twice isn't the same as leaving a message.

2. I don't say "bye." Neither does anyone on Entourage. Don't be offended, it makes me feel cool and fast-paced.

3. Don't doddle. Know what you want to say before you call me. Even practice it a time or two in the mirror. Don't call just to say 'hi', I'd rather chew glass.

4. Instigator assumes responsibility. If we get cut off, it is the duty of the original caller to redial so conversation can commence. If I miss a call from you and call you back, you are still the original caller so the burden is yours.

Following these rules will likely lead to effective and productive and expedient phone interactions. 325.513.1498 - keep me accountable.

Transition

I'm contemplating a name change. Perhaps to "whi'tin whiz dumb." "Blahg" is tired and predictable.




* I reserve the right to not change my ways if it turns out to be too difficult