Like the teeth of a shark

I want to treat this information sensitively, because humans disappearing is sensitive stuff. Some of the faithful Blahglievers have journeyed with me through the valley of the shadow of the University of Phoenix for quite some time now. Friends, we've been flanked.
I can't say I was ready for the cavalry. I thought I had my hands full with the infantry. Then, when I least expect it, Jenine transforms into Holly. That's right, people, my case has been reassigned. Like she knows me, this "Holly" bird leaves me a voicemail yesterday claiming to be my admissions representative. How dare she? Has she any idea of the relationship Jenine and I had formed? Has she any idea of the strength of my resolve to never speak with her?

Joking aside, I might actually miss Jenine. I had grown accustomed to her voice. She was the one bit of humanity in an otherwise technological and robotic world. Jenine, wherever you are, I hope you never forget the battle that was prematurely ended between us. I hope you remember the patience and perseverance with which you pursued me; the endless perseverance. Cheers. And to you Holly, buckle up. You've only strengthened my resolve to never answer your calls. From now on, I fight in memory of Jenine, my first telecommunications stalker. There's something special about the first; I'll never forget you Jenine.