Delinquent Botanists

Community of Blahg-lievers, the world has taken a leap down the road to strange town. In my last post I commented on a rain storm which took place as I sat and watched from my front porch. The morning after I was given a gift, or was the receiver of a prank-you be the judge. I arose Sunday morning to find, in the middle of my front yard, a freshly planted 2.5 foot tall baby palm tree. Further investigation led to the information that this prank cost the prankster at least $70 and possibly up to $200. This prank joins the ranks of the Blahg's beloved files-specifically under the label "il-Luke-al"(when something goes beyond illegal it crosses into the realm of the il-luke-al, which is worse). I don't care who you are and how much money you have to blow on pranks- my landscaping is my business and the dead center of my front yard isn't where I would have planted a palm tree. If you are out there, rogue botanist, keep your trust-fund baby eye on my property because you better know I'm going to love and nurture that tree as if it were my own. Pictures soon.

Transition

The Editor-in-Chief of this fine publication and elected leader of the Community of Blahg-lievers may participate in a Guinness World Record setting activity later this year. Stay posted and get the hype going for Doctoberfest. Ninja vanish.

2 free meals in 12 hours

After performing meticulous surgery on a delectable T-bone last night with some genuinely enjoyable company (they always taste good when they're free-the steak, not the company) , my spirits were untouchable. Even the 10 minute bike ride home through Hurricane Abilene couldn't smudge the smile on my face. Once warm and dry and watching the Suns regain their rightful place as winners, an accidental dart to the leg couldn't even faze me.

Transition, not translation

In this edition of Il-Luke-al (when something goes beyond 'illegal' it becomes 'Il-Luke-al') we remember the man, the myth, the crack-pot: L. Ron Hubbard. On this day in 1950 Hubbard publishes what became the foundation for Scientology- Dienetics. For you visual learners Scientology's mascot is the Dodo bird.

Hubbard earns a spot among the ranks of the Il-Luke-al because of his cracker-jackass beliefs and the "scientific torture experiments" he conducted on his children.

Transition. With gusto

I'm off to another meal on ACU's dollar (seriously) so I bid you Blahg-lievers good day.